Wednesday, May 6, 2015

adoption day

Nicole's adoption was finalized on May 5th. And there were so many times over the last six years that I never thought we would be celebrating another child. There were so many times where I thought it was impossible almost, that it would never happen. From that very moment on Friday, June 13th, 2014 when Nicole came home I felt she was my daughter, I felt she was meant to be here, I felt she was here to stay. And on May 5th, almost one year later, we were blessed to make it all official.

It was a drizzly morning on our way to the court house, the time was somehow mixed up, Erin and Ben and Josh's mom and dad and sister all literally made it just in time, and Laura and Eric raced to get to the court house because they were stuck in traffic and walked in just as the judge signed the adoption papers. Everything happened all way too fast and we were rushed because the judge had another case she had to get in, and in the blink of an eye the celebration in that court room # 2 was done and over. I wanted to do it all over again, to sit back and take it all in, to make it all last longer.

We were surrounded by many of our closest family members and friends in that court room- the people who have been there for us through all of this. In the car, on our way to the courthouse, Josh mentioned how it was really a bittersweet day and it got me thinking. Adoption really is such a bittersweet thing. A loss for Nicole's biological parents, a separation of a daughter from her biological mother and father and siblings and extended family, and all of the obstacles and hard times we overcame to get here over the past six years. A second daughter we have been hoping and wishing for for years. Kennadie becoming a big sister. Nicole gaining a big sister and a mom and dad who love her dearly. So many friends and family members who adore her. A bond so incredibly strong between the four of us that it proves a family is what you make it, that biologically or not it doesn't matter, we are all connected so deeply and it is such a beautiful thing. She was the missing piece all of these years and we could not imagine life without her. She was meant to be here, we were meant to be here, they were meant to be sisters, we were meant to be her parents. Kennadie made me a mom and Nicole has made that emptiness and sadness and longing that I had in my heart for years disappear. Words can never express how blessed I feel to have my two girls and how deeply I love both of them.

This was such a beautiful day that began with my two girls getting ready to officially become sisters and me and Josh getting to officially become parents to two girls.

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The drizzle continued as we walked into the court house and, thankfully everyone made it in that room to celebrate with us. There were many of us in that room, friends and family who I am so, so ridiculously grateful for. The judge said it was the most people she has ever seen at an adoption, and told us that just shows her how much love there is. Love and celebration filled that court room (as well as some tears that I saw when looking around the room).

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I am so thankful that Ben took photos for us because although I had my camera I wanted to try to be in the moment as much as possible and didn't get many photos with my phone and absolutely none with my "real" camera. He was able to catch so many in-between moments that I am grateful we have.

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After the finalization we went out to brunch to celebrate this beautiful and amazing little girl that we waited so long for. I really could not be more proud of the obstacles we have overcome to get here.

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I am so happy to be where we are and be so blessed to have these family members and friends.

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