Friday, November 7, 2014
i feel for her
I may not know the whole story. I don't need to. And although it seems like Little One has been here forever, sometimes I forget she hasn't.
Dropping Little One off for visits I have met her birth parents a few times now. I will admit that I was annoyed that first time. I felt there should be a better system in place for dropping off and picking up children. Many pre-adoptive parents may not want to bump into the birth parents for safety reasons. But after I got over that initial reaction, so many other feelings came up inside of me. Feelings that were much different that I ever thought I would feel.
When I see Little One with her birth parents (especially with her birth mom) my heart goes out to them. Half of me wants to hug her birth mom and tell her that I promise to send photos and letters and that we promise to take good care of Little One. I usually drive away in my car with a tear in my eye. When I look into her birth moms eyes I can see that she loves Little One, I don't doubt that for one second. And I can't pretend to know how or what she may be feeling, but I feel for her birth mom.
Court happens in a few weeks for termination of parental rights and I think one of the harder things about adoption is knowing that there is that other side to it- that loss that many have to experience.
My hope for Little One is that she will have some type of relationship with her birth parents in the future (especially her birth mom), even though we are told that there is a good chance that the birth parents will eventually stop going to visits. I know all we can do is our best, and for Little One we will do just that.